Author Archive
10 Simple Ways to Overcome Disappointment
Everyone is disappointed at some point in their life. Perhaps you didn’t receive the grade you were hoping for on your math test. Maybe you didn’t perform as well as you had hoped for in the big championship soccer game.
My recent disappointment is that despite a good amount of effort, my wife and I have not secured our first real estate investing deal that I put into my goals for 2008. We’ve had quite a few that were very close to going through, but we haven’t quite made it over that “hump”.
Disappointment can be an ugly thing. Disappointment can be a temporary feeling for some people or it may drag others to depression depending on the severity of the disappointment and the mental state of the person. Disappointment has actually been classified as a type of mental stress (see reference).
So, what are some ways to overcome disappointment!
1. Exercise - If something is bothering me, I exercise. I don’t exercise to try and forget about the problem necessarily. I exercise and work through the problem in my head and I seem to always come to a solution. Perhaps it’s the endorphins helping out, but I seem to always come to a resolution.
2. Focus on the Future - There’s a reason why the rearview mirror in a car is small, but the front windshield is large. Focus your attention on what’s in front of you. Sure it’s good to know about the past, but DON”T DWELL ON IT!
3. Be with Friends - It’s amazing what being around friends will do for a person. If you are disappointed about something, find and friend and go talk about your disappointment. A lot of times people think their situation is unique when more often than not, many people have been through the same situation. Plus, it’s good to talk it through and a lot of times you’ll realize that it’s probably not a big deal in the grand scheme of things.
4. Focus on What Makes You Happy - If you are feeling disappointed and watching a comedy makes you happy, go down to the store and rent a comedy from a DVD rental center. If you have kids and they make you happy, go play with them. It won’t take long before you forget about your disappointment.
5. Go Read - Reading can be a great tool to get your mind off of what’s bothering you and allow you to focus on the story in the book. Who knows, perhaps you’ll find that reading is a new hobby for you if you are not already an avid reader.
6. Go Walk Your Dog - If you have a dog, walking them is a great way to keep your mind off of your disappointment. A lot of the dogs I’m around are soi friendly, it’s hard not to forget about your disappointment.
7. You Have Your Health - Despite your disappointment, you have your health. I know I get caught up in sports, goals and activities, but instead of focusing on the fact that we came up short in a soccer game or didn’t quite complete a goal, I focus on the fact that I have my health. I have a lot of friends that are not able to play soccer due to their health so I am certainly thankful for the opportunity to still play.
8. Be Alone - This my seem counterintuitive to some of the other ways to overcome disappointment, but sometimes and for some people, it’s good to be alone. I know I sometimes enjoy being alone so I can have some quite time to myself without the distraction of the television of other noises.
9. Motivation - When I am disappointed about an outcome, it motivates me to not to want to feel that way again. For instance, I’m disappointed that I will probably not make my goal of purchasing our first real estate investment. Instead of hanging my head low over the fact that I didn’t accomplish that goal, I’m going to regroup and double my efforts!
10. Forgive Yourself - Just as you are taught to forgive others for their wrongdoings, you must live to forgive yourself and realize that you are human and not perfect. Things don’t always fall the way you want them do, but if you plan and put enough effort into your goal, you’ll definitely give yourself a good chance at realizing that goal.
What other methods or tricks do you use to overcome disappointment?
Recent Posts:
Bad Medicine is What You Need
5 Ways to Soften the Financial Impact of the Holidays
Happiness is U-Shaped
Interview: CopperReflections.com
Life is Like an Etch-A-Sketch
Cool Links for the Week of December 1st
Car Making Going Green Without Detroit by James Kanter @ Green Inc. - The article presents the notion that Detroit seems to be out of touch with the future of making cars and unfortunately, I can’t say I disagree.
6 Tips for Using Your Twitter Profile to Get New Followers by Sara Rosso @ Twitip - There are some nice tips for people who use Twitter (like me @Happinessisbetr). The emphasis of the article is for people who have a blog or website, but there are some good tips here nevertheless. The big thing for me was the background templates I can use for my own twitter page.
12 Hacks on How to Become a Teamwork Guru @ Manage Your Life Now - A nice list of team work guidelines. One thing I try to keep in mind when I am working with people is that everyone is human and we all have feelings. I think it’s easy to take the human aspect out when there is a disagreement.
15 Ways to Overcome Anger by Tina @ Think Simple Now - Tina always provides great articles on personal development and this is no exception.
The Psychology of Happiness: 13 Steps to a Better Life by J.D. Roth @ Get Rich Slowly - J.D. provides a great list of steps to a better life. I thought it was interesting that he mentioned that we should embrace routine. We are trying to incorporate that into our lives.
5 Great Ways to Give Happiness by MP Dunleavey @ MSN Money - I like the first way to give happiness, “think life, not stuff.”
10 Donations Food Banks Need Most @ MSN Money - The best way to contribute to a food bank is by cold hard cash, but if you aren’t comfortable with that, the next logical choice is food. MSN Money gives a nice list of food they accept.
The Mega List of Personal Development Blogs @ Insight Writer - Here’s a great list of personal development blogs from around the web.
Also, be sure to check out the first ever Personal Development Carnival! The Cyber Monday Edition of Carnival of Personal Finance was also just posted and is chalk full of great bloggers.
Photo by Wili
Bad Medicine is What You Need
No, I’m not referring to the Bon Jovi song from the 80’s (actually titled “Bad Medicine”). I’m referring to the concept that “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”. I think it’s well known that some germs are good and low levels of stress are good, but too much of a good or a bad thing can be bad.
That’s certainly the case, and has now been proven by biologists as detailed in an issue of New Scientist. This concept known as hormesis, means that high doses of a substance can be toxic, but at low doses, it could actually be beneficial. To prove a point the author states that many compounds that improve health at low doses, including vitamin A, vitamin B6, selenium, iron, and zinc, are in fact toxic at high doses.
But antioxidants are a good thing, right?
Mark Mattson and Edward Calabrese explain that antioxidants are part of a wider class of plant chemicals, called phytochemicals, that are toxic at high doses but beneficial at lower doses. The amounts we normally eat are insufficient to reach toxic concentrations in the human body, but are enough to activate our molecular stress responses. In other words they are hormetic stresses.
The article also mentions recent research has also shown that hormesis is responsible for at least some of the health benefits of exercise and calorie reduction. Reducing calorie intake and increasing energy expenditure lowers your risk of diabetes and cardiovascular disease, and we now know this is because diet and exercise induce a state called “mild metabolic stress”, where levels of glucose and the molecular energy currency, ATP, are depleted.
So, what does this all mean to you? For one, it’s scientific proof that proper diet and exercise are a good thing. Throughout our history, we have always modeled things after nature. Whether it was the Wright brothers modeling their airplane after a bird, or more recently, scientists trying to mimic the composition of a spider web, which is extremely strong given its low weight. I think that hormesis (I hadn’t heard of this word prior to reading the article in New Scientist) is something we can look at and model after in our everyday lives. Whether we are exercising, trying to save money for retirement, or trying to eat healthy, we should model after nature and do things in moderation. If things are difficult at first, you should remember that it’s natural and things will get easier because we all need mild stressors to make us stronger and more able to handle more difficult challenges in the future.
Photo by Notions Capital
____________________________________________
Recent Posts
What I’ve Learned From College Football and the Presidential Election
Life is Like an Etch-A-Sketch
Happiness is U-Shaped
5 Ways to Soften the Financial Impact of the Holidays
Frugalicious?
What I’ve Learned From College Football and the Presidential Election
I’m a huge fan of college football. I keep up with the University of Texas Longhorns and a hand full of other teams. I read all of their articles and I am on the message boards. I even keep up with the recruiting through out the year.
This Presidential election was interesting to say the least. There were a few firsts which was exciting to see. It was a great contest between two worthy presidential candidates.
Watching the Presidential election process and the Texas Longhorns, I couldn’t help but see the parallel between the two. Both, Mack Brown, the head coach for the Texas Longhorns, and Barrack Obama, the Presidential candidate for the Democratic party, often spoke about routine.
Is this one of the key factors that sets successful people and apart other people?
If I take a quick scan through the dialogue between Mr. and Mrs. Obama and Steve Croft’s 60 Minutes interview on November 17th on their Personal Transition, I found the word “routine” came up three times. I only point this out because it’s something I happened to notice while watching the interview last Sunday.
Mack Brown also speaks about the routine of the team on a regular basis. On game day, they go through the same routine for every game. It’s all about repetition for them from doing the drills in the same way and the same order to going to meetings and waking up at the same time everyday. This is also the case prior to the start of the season. Mack Brown had his team scrimmage on a Saturday prior to the first game. This is a fan appreciation day, but it also puts the team into the routine of playing a game on Saturday in front of fans. Prior to the scrimmage, they go through all of the motions that they would for a normal game.
As I write this, I wonder what routines I have that are leading me to success. Over the past 6 months, the one routine that I feel has helped me improve is blogging. I have routinely put out 3 blog posts per week. Blogging itself isn’t necessarily helping me per say, but it has helped me get into a routine that I can carry over into other areas of my life.
Peter at Pick the Brain.com has some great suggestions for 10 Morning Habits You Can Build Your Day Upon. Perhaps you looked over the 10 habits that Peter suggested and you aren’t sure whether they are for you or not. Well, Steve Pavlina has a great article titled “30 Days to Success“. In his article, he suggests that you give the habit or routine a 30 day trial. If after the 30 day trial, you aren’t sure whether it’s for you or not, you can extend it to 60 or 90 days or longer. The interesting point he makes is that:
Now if you actually complete a 30-day trial, what’s going to happen? First, you’ll go far enough to establish it as a habit, and it will be easier to maintain than it was to begin it. Secondly, you’ll break the addiction of your old habit during this time. Thirdly, you’ll have 30 days of success behind you, which will give you greater confidence that you can continue. And fourthly, you’ll gain 30 days worth of results, which will give you practical feedback on what you can expect if you continue, putting you in a better place to make informed long-term decisions.
I thought the concept that Steve Pavlina presented was really useful and I will incorporate that into my life when I look at my potential positive habits.
What are some habits you have that you are proud to mention?
Photo by The Austin American Statesman
_________________________________________
Recent Posts
5 Ways to Soften the Financial Impact of the Holidays
Frugalicious?
Life is Like an Etch-A-Sketch
Three Essentials for a Banana Free Living
I Conquered the iPhone
Cool Links for the Week of November 24th
I wish everyone a safe and happy holiday season! Also, if you are interested in doing a guest post, feel free to send me an e-mail: happinessisbetter@gmail.com
Seth Godin Tells Us to Quit by Jeff @ My Supercharged Life - This is a neat article and gives you a different perspective on the old adage “Winners never quit”.
Break Out of Your Money Comfort by Nathalie @ Billionaire Woman - One technique that I found to be really interesting is to gather a bank account statement or a digital copy of the balance in your checking account. Once you have that, using white out for the print out or photoshop for the digital version and put your ideal balance in there. As Nathalie would say, no target, no progress!
Your 5 Minute Guide to Quitting the Rat Race by MSN Staff @ MSN Money - This article has lots of resources for those of you interested in quitting the rat race.
6 Steps to Being Your Own Boss by Kiplinger’s Personal Finance Magazine - Lots of good resources as well as examples of people who are their own boss.
15 Stupid Business Ideas, That Aren’t Stupid at All by Mike @ The Toilet Paper Entrepreneur - This was one of the more amusing business ideas:
Dog Doo Ornament – What better way to decorate your Christmas tree, than with a frosted dog doo?!? I don’t get it, but this thing is actually selling. Then again, I did write the book that ties entrepreneurialism to the bathroom experience.
Blog Carnivals:
The Gonzo Blog Carnival Series - Starts January 13th. If interested in providing a post or hosting the carnival, go here.
Money Hacks Carnival #39 - I was fortunate enough to have an article posted on this carnival so please take a look!
Photo by Swami Stream
