Everyone is disappointed at some point in their life. Perhaps you didn’t receive the grade you were hoping for on your math test. Maybe you didn’t perform as well as you had hoped for in the big championship soccer game.

My recent disappointment is that despite a good amount of effort, my wife and I have not secured our first real estate investing deal that I put into my goals for 2008. We’ve had quite a few that were very close to going through, but we haven’t quite made it over that “hump”.

Disappointment can be an ugly thing. Disappointment can be a temporary feeling for some people or it may drag others to depression depending on the severity of the disappointment and the mental state of the person. Disappointment has actually been classified as a type of mental stress (see reference).

So, what are some ways to overcome disappointment!

1. Exercise - If something is bothering me, I exercise. I don’t exercise to try and forget about the problem necessarily. I exercise and work through the problem in my head and I seem to always come to a solution. Perhaps it’s the endorphins helping out, but I seem to always come to a resolution.

2. Focus on the Future - There’s a reason why the rearview mirror in a car is small, but the front windshield is large. Focus your attention on what’s in front of you. Sure it’s good to know about the past, but DON”T DWELL ON IT!

3. Be with Friends - It’s amazing what being around friends will do for a person. If you are disappointed about something, find and friend and go talk about your disappointment. A lot of times people think their situation is unique when more often than not, many people have been through the same situation. Plus, it’s good to talk it through and a lot of times you’ll realize that it’s probably not a big deal in the grand scheme of things.

4. Focus on What Makes You Happy - If you are feeling disappointed and watching a comedy makes you happy, go down to the store and rent a comedy from a DVD rental center. If you have kids and they make you happy, go play with them. It won’t take long before you forget about your disappointment.

5. Go Read - Reading can be a great tool to get your mind off of what’s bothering you and allow you to focus on the story in the book. Who knows, perhaps you’ll find that reading is a new hobby for you if you are not already an avid reader.

6. Go Walk Your Dog - If you have a dog, walking them is a great way to keep your mind off of your disappointment. A lot of the dogs I’m around are soi friendly, it’s hard not to forget about your disappointment.

7. You Have Your Health - Despite your disappointment, you have your health. I know I get caught up in sports, goals and activities, but instead of focusing on the fact that we came up short in a soccer game or didn’t quite complete a goal, I focus on the fact that I have my health. I have a lot of friends that are not able to play soccer due to their health so I am certainly thankful for the opportunity to still play.

8. Be Alone - This my seem counterintuitive to some of the other ways to overcome disappointment, but sometimes and for some people, it’s good to be alone. I know I sometimes enjoy being alone so I can have some quite time to myself without the distraction of the television of other noises.

9. Motivation - When I am disappointed about an outcome, it motivates me to not to want to feel that way again. For instance, I’m disappointed that I will probably not make my goal of purchasing our first real estate investment. Instead of hanging my head low over the fact that I didn’t accomplish that goal, I’m going to regroup and double my efforts!

10. Forgive Yourself - Just as you are taught to forgive others for their wrongdoings, you must live to forgive yourself and realize that you are human and not perfect. Things don’t always fall the way you want them do, but if you plan and put enough effort into your goal, you’ll definitely give yourself a good chance at realizing that goal.

What other methods or tricks do you use to overcome disappointment?

Photo by Diabloooz, The-O

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The Psychology of Happiness: 13 Steps to a Better Life by J.D. Roth @ Get Rich Slowly - J.D. provides a great list of steps to a better life. I thought it was interesting that he mentioned that we should embrace routine. We are trying to incorporate that into our lives.

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10 Donations Food Banks Need Most @ MSN Money - The best way to contribute to a food bank is by cold hard cash, but if you aren’t comfortable with that, the next logical choice is food. MSN Money gives a nice list of food they accept.

The Mega List of Personal Development Blogs @ Insight Writer - Here’s a great list of personal development blogs from around the web.

Also, be sure to check out the first ever Personal Development Carnival! The Cyber Monday Edition of Carnival of Personal Finance was also just posted and is chalk full of great bloggers.

Photo by Wili

No, I’m not referring to the Bon Jovi song from the 80’s (actually titled “Bad Medicine”). I’m referring to the concept that “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”. I think it’s well known that some germs are good and low levels of stress are good, but too much of a good or a bad thing can be bad.

That’s certainly the case, and has now been proven by biologists as detailed in an issue of New Scientist. This concept known as hormesis, means that high doses of a substance can be toxic, but at low doses, it could actually be beneficial. To prove a point the author states that many compounds that improve health at low doses, including vitamin A, vitamin B6, selenium, iron, and zinc, are in fact toxic at high doses.

But antioxidants are a good thing, right?

Mark Mattson and Edward Calabrese explain that antioxidants are part of a wider class of plant chemicals, called phytochemicals, that are toxic at high doses but beneficial at lower doses. The amounts we normally eat are insufficient to reach toxic concentrations in the human body, but are enough to activate our molecular stress responses. In other words they are hormetic stresses.

The article also mentions recent research has also shown that hormesis is responsible for at least some of the health benefits of exercise and calorie reduction. Reducing calorie intake and increasing energy expenditure lowers your risk of diabetes and cardiovascular disease, and we now know this is because diet and exercise induce a state called “mild metabolic stress”, where levels of glucose and the molecular energy currency, ATP, are depleted.

So, what does this all mean to you? For one, it’s scientific proof that proper diet and exercise are a good thing. Throughout our history, we have always modeled things after nature. Whether it was the Wright brothers modeling their airplane after a bird, or more recently, scientists trying to mimic the composition of a spider web, which is extremely strong given its low weight. I think that hormesis (I hadn’t heard of this word prior to reading the article in New Scientist) is something we can look at and model after in our everyday lives. Whether we are exercising, trying to save money for retirement, or trying to eat healthy, we should model after nature and do things in moderation. If things are difficult at first, you should remember that it’s natural and things will get easier because we all need mild stressors to make us stronger and more able to handle more difficult challenges in the future.

Photo by Notions Capital

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I’m a huge fan of college football. I keep up with the University of Texas Longhorns and a hand full of other teams. I read all of their articles and I am on the message boards. I even keep up with the recruiting through out the year.

This Presidential election was interesting to say the least. There were a few firsts which was exciting to see. It was a great contest between two worthy presidential candidates.

Watching the Presidential election process and the Texas Longhorns, I couldn’t help but see the parallel between the two. Both, Mack Brown, the head coach for the Texas Longhorns, and Barrack Obama, the Presidential candidate for the Democratic party, often spoke about routine.

Is this one of the key factors that sets successful people and apart other people?

If I take a quick scan through the dialogue between Mr. and Mrs. Obama and Steve Croft’s 60 Minutes interview on November 17th on their Personal Transition, I found the word “routine” came up three times. I only point this out because it’s something I happened to notice while watching the interview last Sunday.

Mack Brown also speaks about the routine of the team on a regular basis. On game day, they go through the same routine for every game. It’s all about repetition for them from doing the drills in the same way and the same order to going to meetings and waking up at the same time everyday. This is also the case prior to the start of the season. Mack Brown had his team scrimmage on a Saturday prior to the first game. This is a fan appreciation day, but it also puts the team into the routine of playing a game on Saturday in front of fans. Prior to the scrimmage, they go through all of the motions that they would for a normal game.

As I write this, I wonder what routines I have that are leading me to success. Over the past 6 months, the one routine that I feel has helped me improve is blogging. I have routinely put out 3 blog posts per week. Blogging itself isn’t necessarily helping me per say, but it has helped me get into a routine that I can carry over into other areas of my life.

Peter at Pick the Brain.com has some great suggestions for 10 Morning Habits You Can Build Your Day Upon. Perhaps you looked over the 10 habits that Peter suggested and you aren’t sure whether they are for you or not. Well, Steve Pavlina has a great article titled “30 Days to Success“. In his article, he suggests that you give the habit or routine a 30 day trial. If after the 30 day trial, you aren’t sure whether it’s for you or not, you can extend it to 60 or 90 days or longer. The interesting point he makes is that:

Now if you actually complete a 30-day trial, what’s going to happen? First, you’ll go far enough to establish it as a habit, and it will be easier to maintain than it was to begin it. Secondly, you’ll break the addiction of your old habit during this time. Thirdly, you’ll have 30 days of success behind you, which will give you greater confidence that you can continue. And fourthly, you’ll gain 30 days worth of results, which will give you practical feedback on what you can expect if you continue, putting you in a better place to make informed long-term decisions.    

I thought the concept that Steve Pavlina presented was really useful and I will incorporate that into my life when I look at my potential positive habits.

What are some habits you have that you are proud to mention?

Photo by The Austin American Statesman

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I wish everyone a safe and happy holiday season! Also, if you are interested in doing a guest post, feel free to send me an e-mail: happinessisbetter@gmail.com

Seth Godin Tells Us to Quit by Jeff @ My Supercharged Life - This is a neat article and gives you a different perspective on the old adage “Winners never quit”.

Break Out of Your Money Comfort by Nathalie @ Billionaire Woman - One technique that I found to be really interesting is to gather a bank account statement or a digital copy of the balance in your checking account. Once you have that, using white out for the print out or photoshop for the digital version and put your ideal balance in there. As Nathalie would say, no target, no progress!

Your 5 Minute Guide to Quitting the Rat Race by MSN Staff @ MSN Money - This article has lots of resources for those of you interested in quitting the rat race.

6 Steps to Being Your Own Boss by Kiplinger’s Personal Finance Magazine - Lots of good resources as well as examples of people who are their own boss.

15 Stupid Business Ideas, That Aren’t Stupid at All by Mike @ The Toilet Paper Entrepreneur - This was one of the more amusing business ideas:

Dog Doo Ornament – What better way to decorate your Christmas tree, than with a frosted dog doo?!? I don’t get it, but this thing is actually selling. Then again, I did write the book that ties entrepreneurialism to the bathroom experience.

Blog Carnivals:

The Gonzo Blog Carnival Series - Starts January 13th. If interested in providing a post or hosting the carnival, go here.

Money Hacks Carnival #39 - I was fortunate enough to have an article posted on this carnival so please take a look!

Photo by Swami Stream

The holidays are a fun time. This is the time of year that we make our trips to go visit friends and family and catch up on the past year. This is also a time of year that people tend to spend quite a bit on gifts. Let’s take a look at a few ways you can soften the impact to your pocket book.

1. Draw names - In the situation of large family gatherings, instead of buying gifts for all of your family members, draw names. When you draw names, you are only responsible for buying a present for the person drawn as opposed to buying presents for the entire family. This will limit the number of presents bought by everyone and save everybody a good bit of coin.
2. Make gifts – This most likely will not appeal to the modern day American, but hear me out. Do you think a gift card that I spent absolutely no time or thought would be more appreciated than a hand written letter? In the letter, you could express how much you appreciate what they’ve done for you. J.D. at Get Rich Slowly also has a great list of gifts you can make yourself.
3. Escrow – My wife and I really don’t get each other gifts for Christmas. It seems like other family members pretty much take care of that. Having said that, we do spend some money on other family members and Angel Tree kids. To soften the financial blow, we basically escrow the money in an ING account. Since this February, we’ve been putting back $20 per week into our account. I just looked and we have $673.08! Perhaps this is a little more of a little less than what you typically spend. If so, just alter the weekly amount deposited into your ING account. I’m sure there are many other options for banks, but we’ve found ING to be really easy to use.
4. Take Advantage of Circuit City Store Closings – Circuit City is closing 155 stores nationwide. There can be great deals found at many store closing sales. If you have an electronics need, it may be worth your time to take a look and see if you can score a great deal.
5. Don’t Give Gifts at All – Why not show your generosity by spending time at a homeless shelter serving meals or visiting a retirement home to spend time with people who may not get many visitors. You could get the whole family in on the activity. While it may be hard for some to believe, you can get much more long term satisfaction out of community service than spending your money on more material things.

Photo by Kris Decurtis

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Additional Posts:

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Wouldn’t it be nice if your life was like a Etch-A-Sketch? Dr. Daniel Drubin wrote in Letting Go of Your Bananas:

Take a good, hard look at what you have and, if you don’t like what you see, shake things up. You get to create a new vision as often as you are unwilling to accept some of the limiting pictures in your life.

Is life that simple? Can you change the direction of your life that easily? I contend that if people are fed up with the direction in their life, they will change. It’s a matter of someone’s motivation being greater than their dislike for their direction in life. Otherwise, it’s the path of least resistance and that usually doesn’t lend itself towards change.

Mike King at Learn This recently wrote a great post on motivation that is a great read and pertinent to helping you find the motivation to change!

Once you decide you are going to change, you certainly need direction and focus otherwise you’ll get lost or easily distracted. Dr. Daniel Drubin has some great guidelines to consider as you become the CEO of your life.

1. Think one step ahead and always have a backup plan for whatever you are doing; don’t put all of your plans in one basket.

2. Understand and effectively utilize the power of your personal affirmations and self talk.

3. Be childlike in your unwillingness to accept no as an answer.

4. Live the principles of TELL - Teaching, earning, laughing, learning.

5. Always deliver more than you promise.

6. When given the choice regarding how to think and behave, always choose limitless over limited.

7. With a dramatic need for speed, decide to break the speed barrier for changing your life.

8. Become more purposeful in your thoughts, actions, and attitudes.

9. Eliminate the eighth day of the week: “Someday”.

Are you the CEO of your life? If so, what are some of your guidelines?

Photo by Eliya

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Rich Life Carnival #19

3rd Blogiversary Celebration - Coming November 23rd

Photo by Oddsock

There is a new frugalicious e-book that was recently released by Fox, the writer of squawkfox.com. Fox totes quite the resume as she is in fact a 2 time Iron-man Triathlon finisher. She could’ve just put that in her “About” section and I would’ve been impressed. The title of the e-book is Frugal, Food & Fitness: How to get fit and fab without spending a fortune. Let’s dig in and see if this is frugalicious or not.

Part One

The first chapter of the e-book talks about “Stop Faking it! Eat Frugalicious Food”. She stresses not eating packaged, processed food found at grocery stores. She states that they not only increase your waist line, but they decrease the size of your wallet.

Fox’s Five Frugalicious Food Rules

1. Ignore Fancy Labels and Boxes
2. Avoid fancy healthy claims
3. Avoid pronunciation problems
4. Ask the Bugs – If the bugs won’t eat it, neither should you.
5. Ask Your Grandmother

I agree with all of these rules. Basically, if there are a lot of ingredients and you don’t what they are or have a hard time pronouncing them, it probably is not very healthy.

Fox’s Fantastic Frugalicious Foods

1. Dried Beans
2. Quinoa
3. Natural Peanut Butter
4. Flax
5. Quark
6. Eggs
7. Fruits
8. Vegetables
9. Lean Meats
10. Steel Cut Oats

Ok. I’m going to plead ignorance on some of these foods. Here is what Wikipedia had to say about quinoa:

Unlike wheat or rice (which are low in lysine), quinoa contains a balanced set of essential amino acids for humans, making it an unusually complete protein source.^[5] It is a good source of dietary fiber and phosphorus and is high in magnesium and iron. Quinoa is gluten free and considered easy to digest. Because of all these characteristics, quinoa is being considered as a possible crop in NASA’s Controlled Ecological Life Support System for long-duration manned spaceflights.

Wikipedia is not the end all be all source, but I think it’s certainly a good starting point for reference in some cases. In addition, if NASA is considering it as a possible crop for their ecological life support system for long-duration space flights, you may want to give it a consideration.

Why Soaking Dried Beans Can Change Your Life

This statement, while it may be a little overzealous, could in fact change a lot of your eating habits. My wife and I want to eat healthier, etc and this is one of the foods that many popular bloggers have often referred to such as Trent at The Simple Dollar.

She came up with a great list as to why dried beans rock, and may in fact rock your world.

1. Price

2. Sodium Free

3. Healthier

4. Tastier

5. Less Waste and Environmentally Friendly

6. More Variety and Selection

7. More Cooking Control

8. Bisphenol A (BPA)

9. Less Storage Space

10. Soaking Beans in Easy

I think out of this list, the biggest impact for my wife and I in eating dried beans would have is that we would be eating less sodium. I think my wife and I eat better than most people, but we still eat plenty of packaged foods and while they are organic or natural, they still contain a ton of sodium.

I know I’ve always been told that excess sodium or salt is bad for you, but I did not know why until I took a look at the American Heart Association website. They state that excess sodium or salt could potentially raise blood pressure for some individuals. Salt retains water. Excess water retained in your body can add strain to your heart causing your blood pressure to rise as stated on the “How Can I Lower My Blood Pressure” worksheet provided by the American Heart Association.

How to Soak and Cook Dried Beans

Fox goes into detail as to the various methods for soaking beans. I’m the first to admit that I’m not much of a cook and this all seems very easy even to me.

Printable Grocery List

The printable grocery list is one of the gems of this e-book. Linky. The printable grocery list can help in many ways. Here are a few according to Fox:

• Save Big Bucks by curbing impulse food shopping
• Save money by avoiding expensively packaged fake foods
• Identify healthy, whole, and frugal foods on a single master list
• Keep track of only the foods you need
• Save time grocery shopping
• Get slim, trim, and fit by not buying foods high in calories
• Never forget another grocery item, ever again

Part 2

Lots of great recipes. I will show the breakfast foods because that’s my favorite meal of the day, but there are a lot of great recipes you should check out in this e-book!

Five Frugalicious Breakfasts

1. Steel Cut Oatmeal with Apple
2. Fresh Fruit
3. Omelette with Beans
4. Quinoa with Fruit
5. Peanut Butter on Toast

These breakfast items all sound delicious to me, or should I say frugalicious.

Part 3

Getting fit shouldn’t cost you an arm and a leg. The act of burning calories is free to all of those who wish to get moving. To help get your motor running, muscles flexing, and calories burning, consider some of these affordable fitness activities.

Here is her list of activities that you can do without breaking the bank:

1. Walking - Do you live close to your neighborhood grocery store. Why not try walking down there instead of taking your car. If that doesn’t work for you, try walking during your lunch break at work or walking your dog.
2. Gardening - This is a great way to exercise and you can cut down on spending as well if you have a lawn mowing service. We hired a lawn service in the past, but now I do the mowing. This gets me outside moving around and we save $40 per month.
3. Volunteering - This is one I did not think about before, but it makes sense. Fox suggests volunteering at a athletic event. I’ve been to a few triathlons lately as a spectator and it’s really inspiring to watch people accomplish so much.
4. Biking - This is probably one of my favorite activities. This is definitely a low cost activity especially if you already have a bike in the garage. Why not go out for a spin on a Saturday morning?
5. Swimming - You don’t need to have a fitness membership. Fox suggests that you go for a dip in a local community pool or lake.
6. Take a Hike - This is probably my favorite form of exercising. It’s nice to be around nature and exercise all at the same time plus it’ll give you time to bond with any friends of family that may join.
7. Rollerblading - Rollerblading is a ton of fun, but it is definitely something you want to ease into to avoid injury.
8. Running - Running is a great form of exercise, but as Fox points out, “nothing sours running more than an ouchy sports injury”.
9. Join a Team - Fox suggests that joining a team can help you in your quest for fitness. She suggests trying baseball, soccer, football, hockey, utlimate frisbee, beach volleyball, road racing, or softball.
10. Play with Your Kids - Kids are always full of energy. Why not use that as an opportunity to get yourself and your kids some exercise while also bonding all at the same time.

Is this e-book frugalicious? I certainly think it is indeed frugalicious. Fox gives a lot of great tips for saving money while eating healthy, great recipes, and great tips on being fit. She is after all a two-time Iron Man Triathlon finisher so she knows what she’s talking about!

Go grab the e-book today!

Photo by TotalAldo

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Other posts you may enjoy!

Three Essentials for a Banana Free Living
The Most Powerful Weapon in the World
Interview: LiveWorkDream.com

I’m currently reading Letting Go of Your Bananas. Bananas in this instance, are the positive and negative things in your life. Like life, there are good bananas and rotten bananas. This book aims to help you become more successful by getting rid of everything rotten in your life.

The first piece of advice is to:

1. Maintain a willingness to be coached

I think this holds true in all facets of life. Of the successful people I know, many of them have mentors (similar to a coach). If someone isn’t willing to take the advice of others and learn from other people’s successes and failures, they may find it difficult to obtain the type of success they desire. I think in general, the intent of this statement is for individuals to keep an open mind and be willing to learn from others.

2. Develop a consistently powerful work ethic

Nothing is going to come easy. If you want something, you are going to have to work for it. Michael Jordan didn’t become the best basketball player of all time overnight. He had to work for it. On the other hand, you don’t want to end up on the extreme other side of the scale where you are putting your health at risk as has been the case in Japan as reported by the Washington Post. Zen Habits has a great post about Balance Between Life and Work.

3. Always be crystal clear about the direction of your life

If you want to know where you are going in life, you need goals. Goals are great, but they need to be manageable or else you’ll get frustrated and quit. Steve Pavlina has a great post on How to Set Goals You Will Actually Achieve. One thing I have done to help me achieve my goals is to start a blog. Here are My Goals for the Remainder of 2008. There are a few reasons why I started a blog to help achieve my goals.

1. I want you, the reader, to help keep me accountable. I don’t want to look like a douche bag for not completing at least most of my goals. I’ll admit though that most of my goals for this year focus on being consistent. In my opinion, that’s probably my biggest problem.

2. My goals are written down on my blog. I look at them from just about anywhere in the world and I don’t have the opportunity to lose another piece of paper :).

3. My blog helps me with my biggest problem, consistency. There have been a few night where I have really not felt like putting up a post. The recent work travel has really limited my time spent at home where I usually type up my post. However, I have consistently posted 3 times per week (2 posts and 1 Cool Links of the Week) since June so I am very happy about that.

Photo by Pamela Heywood

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